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What can you do if your kids don't clean up?

It drives me crazy, all the rubbish lying around. My kids can't clean up. It ranges from clothes on the bedroom floor to towels on the bathroom floor. Glasses on the desk, bags on the floor and empty plastic containers under the bed. Popsicle sticks on the table, beads on the counter and school bags right behind the back door. A hairbrush (full of hair) on the sink, dirty laundry under the bedside table, shoes in the middle of the living room, hair bows on the windowsill and so on. It is clear:tidying up is not in my children's dictionary.

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Children and tidying up; it is and remains a great challenge

Before you point a finger, I would like to say - in my defense - that we really did spend some time cleaning up with the children during the upbringing. For real. Okay, maybe a little less consistent than I would have liked, but still. In recent years I have involved my children in doing chores, but it is not all there yet. But everything we've done in recent years to teach our kids about tidying up and keeping tidy has been completely destroyed by the adolescent brain. The brain that is in the IK position, so to speak.

I recognize myself enormously in Wanda's blog about household chores and her adolescents. And yet something has to be done about it. Last Sunday Frank and I got a big cake. When we got home, we called up our adolescent and teenager for a good conversation. We thought 'first pamper' and then make good agreements.

Make agreements with your children to tidy up around

It all sounds so simple to clean up, but in the execution the children seem to lack a lot of it. During our 'well-padded' conversation, my daughter completely agrees that they can indeed help with cleaning up a bit more. Until it is an hour later and she seems to have forgotten the entire conversation.

On the other hand, my son is not impressed at all. In fact; he says it's our own fault. If only we hadn't let him help so much in the garden during the renovation. Pffff, really… I don't want to trivialize anything, but in the corona time, the gentleman has been home for six months and he indeed sometimes had to help in the garden. But much? No way!

What can you do if your children don't want to help clean up?

Well, let's just say… the cake was tasty, but the conversation wasn't really constructive. So I studied what you can do now if your children don't help clean up. I will check off the list below myself in the coming months. See what works here at home. Maybe I should start one more time with 'a good conversation' and explain why it is important to me that cleaning is done, but that is really the last time. After that?

  1. Boycott everything and only clean up my own mess
  2. Making stuff mysteriously disappear
  3. No longer helping to find things that are lost
  4. Every evening after dinner, we all clean up for 5 minutes
  5. Or, twice a week, a 30-minute clean-up round with the family
  6. Throw all the clutter in the house that belongs to the children in their bedrooms; preferably in bed so that they cannot go to sleep immediately
  7. A reward system? I think they are past that age for me, but it can still work with smaller children
  8. Put a box in every room in which I throw all the rubbish. Then it is kind of 'tidy up' and they can go and find out themselves
  9. Run a broom across the room and sweep everything to the doorway, or under the bed. Can they look for it there themselves
  10. Throw things outside in a crate, out of sight and when it starts to rain… well…
  11. Total meal stop; don't start cooking again until the kids clean up
  12. Buy a puppy that will eat anything

The garbage bag method if your kids don't clean up

It may be kind of a last resort, but one that works well if your kids aren't cleaning up. After the last warning, grab a garbage bag. All the rubbish that you come across you plop in the garbage bag and then throw it in the wheelie bin. So everything you encounter is cleaned up. You will probably only have to do this once, and then the children will learn what tidying up means. If they have to buy everything again after that one time because it has disappeared, then surely a light will come on?

Would you like to apply this a little more nuanced? Then you can also put everything you find in the shed in a box or crate. This way the children can go get it in the shed if they have lost something. Will it still be there after a month? Then let it disappear in the click.

If your kids don't want to help set the table? Then the tip below is worth gold:

I cook so I think the table should be set by one of the children. That's what I ask. Usually I have to wait a long time, ask 2 more times and then grumble again. But I read this action with someone else and I think it's downright genius! No plates on the table? Then just grab a plate for yourself and your partner to scoop up food. Since the children don't need a plate, you just throw the food on the table (especially with sauce or gravy it's great). Perhaps it is useful to work with a good tablecloth so that your table does not suffer too much.

I will definitely use this myself, I think it's really great!

Specific attention to the laundry basket and the laundry

In addition to the normal mess that the children have to clean up, the laundry is of course also a challenge. In our house the children have their own laundry basket in the room and even that is too much trouble!

  1. Wash only laundry that is in the laundry basket
  2. Or; don't wash anything until it is cleaned up
  3. Just wash the clothes and hang them up as they leave them on their floor, with half a trouser leg inside out or socks completely folded and crumpled up. Then give it back. Washed, but in the same condition.
  4. Do your children also drop their clothes where they are? Especially in their bedroom? Then it might still be an idea to throw the clean clothes from the doorway into their bedroom. After all, it's 'normal' to throw the clothes on the floor, right? Preferably if they are in the bedroom themselves. Only then will your action really make an impression!

More information about multiple laundry baskets

Conclusion:if the children don't want to clean up, there are plenty of methods to get them moving anyway 😉 . Which one do you (already) apply? Or is it no problem at all in your house?