Love can be as blissful as it is painful. When it's thriving, we feel on top of the world. But when it fades, it triggers anxiety and sadness. At times, love feels downright cruel. Common culprits for disillusionment include betrayal, routine breeding boredom, endless quarrels, or growing distance. Yet, research reveals an unexpected predictor of divorce or breakup: excessive early affection. Counterintuitive? Here's the science behind it.
Published in the Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, a landmark study tracked 168 couples over thirteen years to uncover what makes marriages last—or fail. It found that overwhelming passion at the start of a relationship raises the risk of rupture later on. "As newlyweds, couples who divorced after seven or more years were almost dizzyingly loving, showing about a third more affection than spouses who remained happily married," the researchers noted.
Madeleine Mason Roantree, a psychologist specializing in romantic relationships, isn't surprised. "Some people get swept up in the excitement of a new relationship—hence 'love is blind'—but infatuation and passion aren't sustainable states. Once they fade, you're left with what's really there. If passion was the only bond, the relationship is at risk of collapsing," she explained in The Independent.
Whether this reassures you (your partner isn't overly affectionate) or worries you (they were from the start), remember: love defies exact formulas.
