We thought this was a thing of the past, like fur on steering wheels. Gentlemen, even if we got swept away and you took us to the stars, saying this drops your sex appeal to Patrick Sébastien levels. We'll bolt faster than lightning. This feels like a 1970s porn script—no thanks. Are you implying we owe you gratitude, like you ended world hunger? Sex is a two-way street; we both contribute equally. Instead, just ask, “Did you enjoy it?” We might not answer post-coitally, but it's far better.
Thanks for sharing your cosmic insights and confirming you had fun—we're thrilled too. But ban 'good shot' from post-sex vocab. It makes us feel like we passed a test, not shared intimacy. Performance pressure blocks many women, sidelining pleasure—which is the whole point.
Would you like us asking about your back or chest carpet? Your eagle eye is noted, but it's vexing. It hits body image and intimacy hard—instant buzzkill. Imagine us saying, “Does she always lean right, or just post-sex?” Ouch. For Woodstock nostalgics, say you prefer smooth instead. Hair removal timing matters; growth phases happen—no schedules are perfect.
Implying: 'Sleep with guys after hours?' If I'd known, I might've cooled my hormones (ditto for you). Unless you're writing an anthropology book, it questions our virtue—but we do what we want, and it didn't stop us earlier.
Gentlemen, savor those timeless moments instead of scrutinizing us. What if we commented on your bulging forehead vein mid-thrust? We'd ignore it. We strive for perfection, even in bed—no need to highlight grimaces. Letting go means not controlling every expression.
Slow down, Usain Bolt. Orgasm isn't mandatory. No finale doesn't ruin the experience—we enjoyed the journey. Kudos for effort, but implying it's abnormal stresses us. Orgasms aren't automatic (like antibiotics). Don't turn it into a challenge or demand explanations—it's exhausting.
We know the 'one-night stand' drill. Sometimes it's clumsy phrasing in a tender moment, but we're not naive. We might've planned to leave anyway. Be upfront beforehand—avoids feeling like a used gym sock tossed aside.
The killer blow. In long-term relationships, romance can turn practical, but post-sex errands scream 'next time reminder.' Save fridge lists for later—not when we're blissed out. Brain off Post-it mode.
What if we just stayed silent and enjoyed it?
PS: These lines have all been said—yes, really.
PS2: No scandal—this applies to women too.
