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5 sex fantasies vs reality

1/ Do it in the shower. The most accessible a priori. In the movies, from the water dripping on the bodies to the wrists glued against the tiles, passing through the passionate kisses, it sends dreams! Except that in real life, you don't know how to put yourself on because there isn't enough space, you have slippery feet, the water running over your body is much less sexy (warning:you can even drink the cup through the nose). In short, we often end up warm under the duvet. No but!

2/ Do it on a beach. So there, I have to be honest, I never did. It's not that I miss the desire, no, no, no, it's just that not having a private beach or a private jet, when I'm on a beach, it's often stuck between an umbrella Coca Cola, a triplet of brats (not mine!) throwing sand in my eyes, and then I'm way too busy dealing with my reading and the rising tide ("we recuuule the towels!"). The evening ? Well, I eat good meals and chocolate ice cream. Here is. Peel my behind trying to find a corner without prying eyes? After the heat of the day? Frankly ? Not want. And then I'm sure it scratches everywhere with the sand. No. I prefer the resto/dodo option.

3/ Do it in a field (yes, yes, like in Match Point). Here, I live in town. So it seems complicated to me… My mother, whom I go to see from time to time, lives well in the depths of the Gers, fine, but when you hear the owls howling at night, the cats fighting (“MiaaaAAAAaaaaAAAAA!!! "), that you are no longer used to living in silence and that suddenly you are sure that a psychopath must necessarily be prowling around like in horror movies, believe me, you don't have don't want to let your little buttocks hang out. And then, after all the duck breast and confit of duck you've swallowed, you're too heavy for that.

4/ Do it in the street. It's funny, with my guy, when we go for a romantic walk, we often feel like it... "Oh yes, oh yes!" But where ? Right here ? Ha no, there is a neighbor looking at her window. And here ? We would be seen from the street… And there? No but you're serious! There is a schoolyard next door!!! ". Short. So we come home empty-handed each time, the tail (unfortunately) between our legs. Damn.

5/ Do it in a car. This is where we realize that our body is much less flexible than we think… And go ahead, I'm struggling to find a place where we won't see the car shake (too much) (with two bodies wriggling like caterpillars inside), and go ahead I twist my chest in all directions, and go ahead I crush things that should not be crushed, ... The mess, in short. The ideal (but ok, less sexy than the Carmasutra we see on tv)? Sit side by side in the back, forehead to forehead, and do good to each other, at the same time or in turn. I say that, I say nothing… 😉